Send Me an Angel
by Shelby Chace
Summary: James and Catherine before and after the birth of their child. The aftermath is rough for James while he has to cope with his newborn son. It's really about the relationship between James and his son, Castiel. Dramatic and intense story.


_**Send Me an Angel**_

_June 6, 2258_

"Stop fidgeting." James muttered negligently and tied the white laces of the shoe belonging to the woman who simply giggled in response.

"That tickles." She said and smiled wider when his grayed glare flickered up to hers.

James sighed with a false annoyance and rose from his knee, white lab coat unfolding with the movement. His wife stared lovingly up at him with the most beautiful blue eyes he had ever seen.

Like an entire sapphire sky had been trapped within the irises, he was struck lovesick whenever she would glace his way. This woman was striking. Her velvety raven hair fell delicately over her slim shoulders, complimenting her soft gorgeous features like a porcelain doll. In addition to her angelic appearance, which had him ensnared from day one, she also was the kindest and most passionate person he'd ever met. Her compassion was endless. James was crazy about her.

Catherine, being extremely pregnant, could no longer reach and tie her own shoes. She thought this was both irritating and humorous. The moment she discovered that she was expecting was immediately one of the happiest in her life. She always wanted a baby, an adorable little thing that would acutely resemble her husband and herself.

James sat on the couch beside her and stretched. He was tired. Almost every night she would wake him and beg him to get her a snack, which was practically an entire meal. She always craved peanut butter and chocolate then something spicy afterward. 'The baby is very hungry.' she'd say with a huge pretty smile on her face. James would laugh and convince her yet again that it was going to be a boy. 'It's a boy, I know it.' He'd repeat, but Catherine simply would shake her head and say that she still wanted it to be a surprise no matter what.

The soon-to-be father sat beside his wife, sinking drowsily into the cushions. "How are you feeling?" James asked with eyes closed and head against the pillow. He knew she was achy, fatigued, and due very soon. She could go into labor any day and he was constantly stressed that it would be the most terrible timing.

"Wonderful." Catherine replied, gently running a hand over her extended stomach.

James was about to respond but his wife gasped. "James!"

"No, I'm not getting you a peanut butter sandwich right now." He gritted his teeth. "Give me two minutes please, Cathy…"

"No," she laughed and grabbed his wrist, "The baby is kicking. Feel!"

James looked to his wife's face and to her abdomen then back again. "I don't feel anything."

Catherine rolled her baby-blue eyes and sighed. "Just wait."

James felt nothing, but left his hand on her stomach as she patiently waited for another kick. "Maybe…" just as he spoke a quick thump hit his palm.

"The baby kicks when you talk." Catherine smiled and watched as a gigantic grin spread across her husband's face.

Her husband was an attractive man. James was tall and sturdily built gentleman with striking angular features of his face. He bore deep soulful grey eyes, full lips, defined cheekbones, and a sculpted jaw line. His hair was smooth chocolate-brown and kept short and conservative, suave. If they did have a boy, Catherine thought, he'd share those features.

"James, talk." She ordered when the small force faded.

He chuckled. "You're a boy, aren't you?" He said gently and soon that pressure pressed against his hand again, but harder.

"Oh!" Catherine giggled, but shifted uncomfortably. "I think he's stretching."

"Ha!" James announced and she stared blankly at him, surprised. "You said _he_! See, it's a boy."

"Sure." She replied with an eye roll and a side smirk. "Don't be upset if we have a little girl with pigtails." She laughed.

"I'll be happy with whatever God decides to give us." He gushed and kissed her on the cheek.

"Good." Catherine responded lightly and placed a sweet, delicate kiss on his lips. "You better otherwise I'll make you clean up every poop diaper."

"What?" James widened his grey eyes with fear as his wife laughed and rose from the couch.

"I'm joking, James." She said with a smirk on her pink full lips. "Or am I?" she cackled and waddled through the doorway.

"That's not funny, Catherine." He replied, following her down the corridor as she turned back and winked at him. "Cathy!"

_Tuesday, June 13, 2258_

The Super Mutant attacks on the Jefferson Memorial where becoming steadily worse. The Brotherhood of Steel kept up their responsibility of protecting Doctor Li and her team, but James did often fear that somehow Project Purity would become endangered. He also feared for his wife's wellbeing, if something ever happened to her he'd never forgive himself.

"James, I don't appreciate how these people are not taking our work seriously." Madison Li was complaining yet again, "Those soldiers are not addressing this situation properly!"

"What would you have me do, Madison?" James replied jadedly, performing a task with beakers and hotplates. "Go on out there and show them how to appropriately take a Super Mutant's head off its shoulders?" She knew he was never a physical fighter or some warrior with a smoking gun.

Catherine snickered to herself from where she was sitting, scribbling notes and procedures down on a clipboard. She also never had the experience of fighting for her life.

"This is serious, James!" Madison exclaimed and he turned to face her. "We've all heard about those creatures' advance on this building."

As she said this, James' gaze flickered over to his wife whom shot him a glance of concern. He understood her thought with that look and licked his lips. "There is no way they can get past our defenses, the Brotherhood is well equipped."

Madison scoffed and paced. "Damn Brotherhood is a bunch of untrustworthy politicians." She spat.

James sighed and glanced about the control chamber, now noticing how edgy the other scientists were. There were shots and shouts from outside, a battle drawn from earlier that morning.

"I need another set of vials." He said, changing the subject.

"I'll get them." Catherine chirped and slowly stood from the chair, in need of escaping the tension.

"No, Cathy, it's…" James began to object but she cut him off.

She pressed a hand against her lower back and smirked at him. "Relax, James." She said, simply wanting to help in someway, "I'm very capable of walking up and down the stairs."

James lowered his brow. "Catherine…" he began again, however, this time Madison sliced at his speech, continuing to shout at him about the ordeal neither he nor she had control over.

Catherine wandered down the basement stairs lost in thought. She knew everyone was stressed, the mixed conflict with the Enclave, super mutants, and the funding of the project by the Brotherhood all creating tension at once. Perhaps it would blow over in a matter of weeks, she had no idea.

The mother-to-be entered the sublevel clinic and flicked on the fluorescent lights in the steel ceiling. There were many rows of cabinets and shelves at the far end of the small room. She strode over to the rows and began to search. A lone operating slab sat vacant in the center of the floor along side a little supply cart and an empty IV stand. Atop the cart were shiny metal utensils and instruments of medicine, placed perfectly parallel to one another on the tray. She hated perfection.

Catherine hummed an Elvis Presley song to herself while running her fingers over tools, hunting for the vials James spoke of. Being down there alone was partially creepy and comfortable for her. It was nice to get away from the clatter up stairs, but there was a certain loneliness down there. It was an old building, before the war, and it made many uncanny little sounds.

Suddenly, a loud alarm siren exploded in the building. Catherine jumped with a little yelp and gazed up to the rotating red light above the doorway. Her heart pounded in her throat, as she stood there motionless, awaiting a voice off the intercom. The brawl from the surface heightened in volume and now could be heard as if it were just on the other side of the wall. She told herself to remain calm and wait it out. It was only a warning bell, nothing to get all worked up about.

James was started by the sudden alarm just as well as the rest of the scientists about the small lab. He furrowed his brow and watched the red light dance over the translucent equipment and metallic machinery.

His grey eyes drifted back to Madison at his side and he realized she was just as shocked as he was. "What's happening?"

"I don't know, James, but I think something is very wrong out there." Her voice wavered, as she seemed to stare into a void. She was never good in the line of dramatic situations.

James pursed his lips and began to wander about the lab, trying to get some piece of valuable information. A small group of his now well-known employees and friends stood at the far end of the room in a little hushed circle. They looked up to him even when most wouldn't admit it; he was the leader in all affairs anyway. He strode over to them in quick long strides, white coat tails drifting behind him.

"Is everyone alright?"

James touched Anna Holt's arm as he entered the group. He stood much taller than most of them, Anna scooted out from under him. "James, what's going on?" she snapped.

"I heard that down in the sub-basement some super mutants broke through… that the Brotherhood couldn't hold them back any longer…they must have entered through the drainage pipes. " Alex Dargon muttered very quickly and James studied him with a hardened expression painted upon his handsome face.

"Are you sure about this?" James inquired, but before Alex could reply about five Brotherhood soldiers entered the lab with the clanking of their metallic armor.

Star Paladin Cross lead the team. She was a tall young woman with mocha skin, tough features, and a comforting, yet bleak way of speaking. She came to James first and without hesitation as Madison Li aimed to speak to her, but ended up chasing after her instead.

"James," Cross greeted yet paid no heed to the four others behind him.

"Cross, tell me what's happened. The truth." James said sternly and awaited her response with clever eyes.

She took in a breath then ran her eyes over the other scientists. "We've lost ground. The mutants have broken a hole into one the drainage channels… it's only a matter of time until they swarm the place. We must move quickly."

James ran over all this information in his racing mind and then something clicked in his brain. "Move? You mean as in evacuating the Rotunda?"

"Yes, that's correct. My team and I will escort you and yours to a safer location in the upper levels until we can deal with this problem directly."

"Deal with the mutants directly?" Madison chirped, "You idiots shouldn't have lost control of them in the first place!"

"Madison…" James muttered, but began to grow all the more anxious. "Alright, Cross, take these people with you. I need to locate my wife, I'll be with you shortly."

Cross shook her head, yet ignored Madison's glare. "There is no time, you must be evacuated immediately."

Dr. Li looked at James with wide eyes of worry now. "I can't leave her down there, please just give me a moment and we'll all head to safer conditions." He said in a firm voice, nothing was going to keep him from the love of his life.

"I cannot allow you to do that, James." She replied sharply and gave an order to her men as the other scientists began to be flushed toward the exit of the lab.

James stood his ground and would not budge. "You don't understand," he said and motioned with his hands, eagerness shaking him. "I can't leave her down there! She could be in danger at this moment, please, just let me find her. She's my wife."

Not a single word was spoken through the intercom. Catherine ran her fingertips over the cool glass of the vials before her, yet had forgotten about them. She inched toward the doorway slowly and with tense caution. Something wasn't right. Eerie sounds of battle and ciaos suddenly froze as if time had ceased. Cathy held her breath and passed by the doorway to the other side of the room while keeping her eyes glued to the bleak glimpse of the hall through that threshold.

The intercom was stapled to the wall firmly with a little red blinking light acknowledging that the system was in working order. Cathy pressed her finger to the grey communicative button and leaned in to speak. She kept her gaze still on the doorway, wary of entering the corridor.

"James, what's going on?" she spoke quietly as the alarm siren ceased its screaming. "Hello? Can anyone hear me? James?"

Nothing. Static was the only response from the other receiving end. Catherine sighed and attempted to ignore the thundering pulse in her ears. She stood there and ran a hand through her long dark hair. It was happening so slowly and she was getting nowhere, no answers. The tension in the air made her want to scream to break that uncanny silence. She decided to just head back the way she came and try not to look back. As she strode toward the exit a 10-millimeter pistol caught her eye.

The black weapon was placed upon another wheeled cart beside the door with a light film of dust over it; she hadn't seen it until now. Her stomach flipped when her blue gaze fell upon it and something in the back of her brain told her to grab it. Grab the gun.

Catherine disregarded the little warning and broke that brink into the corridor. There was a creaking groan from the wastes above and Cathy bit her lip in attempt to decipher what the hell that was. The cold steel corridor never seemed to stretch to such a length, never seemed so dark, and never so thick with pressure.

After the groaning of metal faded for but a mere moment a deafening screech and rumble shook the hallway with the frightened scientist in it. Catherine screamed with terror and sudden alarm as the lighting shut down in a quick jolt. Her hands flew up to her face and she pressed back up against the wall beside her. She was unsure of what she should do. Run? Don't run? How could she run? Cathy couldn't believe what was happening, couldn't grasp the fact.

"Shit…" she mumbled as her eyes adjusted to the abrupt darkness. Just get upstairs, she thought, just find James.

From down the corridor to her left she could hear footsteps. These weren't normal human footsteps; they were huge and loud. Her heart throbbed in her throat as the baby within her kicked up a storm, tossing and turning.

"Oh God…" she whispered to herself as the entity inched closer to her position. Catherine realized that she wouldn't be able to run; she wouldn't be able to make it up the stairs in time.

Closer and closer the being was coming to her, striding down the hall almost leisurely. She pushed herself from the wall and snuck back into the medical room beside her. Pressing up against the wall near the intercom the pistol once again called to her. Practically without thinking she grabbed it. It felt heavy and cold in her hands. She knew how a gun worked, yet never had the experience of using one.

The footsteps were virtually on top of her now. Maybe if she kept quiet and still the thing would bypass her, she thought in her rushing mind. She could now hear heavy breathing like snorting and she inched her way toward the far end of the small room.

She was breathless with fear rising up like knives in her chest. What is it? Suddenly a loud metallic crash hit the floor beside her and the medical instruments that were once atop the cart hit the ground at her feet. She gritted her teeth and swore at herself for knocking it over.

"Someone there?" a deep inhuman voice called almost gingerly, Catherine froze. It speaks? "I can smell you! Stop hiding!" it screamed.

Catherine held her breath and shivered when she finally hit the metallic wall. Only the red flashing alarm light from above the doorway covered her in light for brief moments. Holding the weapon away from herself, Catherine checked if it was loaded, it was. She slid the clip back into the pistol and flicked the safety off as the baby in her belly kicked violently.

"_Shhhh_…" she hushed with a hand on her stomach and closed her eyes, attempting to both calm the baby and herself. Her heart pounded against her ribs and she felt her hands shake as she clung to the weapon.

"Whose there!" the thing yelled as it now was at the door. Cathy froze with her eyes pinned on the large creature. It stood immense in the doorway, nearly too bulky to fit through. It was illuminated as a black silhouette against the blue back-up lights in the corridor.

Catherine raised the 10-millimeter with outstretched arms almost robotically, her fear suddenly turned to hate. She knew what she needed to do, for the sake of herself and her unborn child. In that second the monster saw her as the red light fell over her.

"There you are!" it screamed and darted forward with a raised two-by-four, nails protruding from it like spikes.

"Fuck you!" she shouted back and pulled the trigger. The scientist screamed in terror and revulsion and open fired straight into the creature's head, its face beginning to distort more so. She never knew she had such a great shot, very precise. Catherine squeezed off the entire clip into the thing's brain and it fell to its knees. The mutant never had the chance to even enter the room as it fell back across the narrow hall, ugly body propped up against the wall. Blood fizzed upon the wall at the height of which it once stood, the liquid streaming down the metal wall.

James heard the shots. He ran down through the basement and down a small staircase as Paladin Cross and Madison Li followed after him. James came to a slipping halt before a super mutant laid out dead on the floor, its dark blood pooling beneath it.

The two women stared down at the thing as he called out and jumped over it and into the tiny medial room. "Catherine!" he cried out searching desperately for her. He never before felt so helpless.

James found her. There was his young wife seated upon the floor backed up against the wall. She had her knees up as close to her person as they would go.

"Cathy," James said to her yet she wasn't looking at him. She appeared petrified with large eyes and a blank shocked expression staring through him. He noticed she was holding onto a gun tightly as if for life.

James knelt down to her. "Catherine, look at me," he tried to capture her attention, "Cathy, let go of the gun… Cathy it's me, it's James… Cathy?" He gently touched her cheek and stared into her blue eyes with guilt and despair.

"Cat?" Madison called quietly from a few feet away as Cross stalked down the corridor to mow down any other mutants capable of coming up from the pipes.

James tried to pull the weapon away from her. "Cathy, give me the gun," she couldn't hear him. James raised his voice. "Catherine, let go, let go of the gun!"

Catherine's startled gaze fell upon him and allowed him to slowly pry the weapon from her shaky grasp. James tossed it away as it slid across the floor and he took her face in his hands. "James…"

"Are you alright? Are you hurt, Cathy? Catherine…"

She nodded hysterically. "I'm okay, I'm okay." She had tears in her sapphire eyes like crystals. "James, I had to… I couldn't … I … it's dead isn't it? Is it dead?"

"Yes, its dead…" he watched as tears rolled down her pink cheeks.

"Oh, James…" she sobbed and flung her arms up around his neck. "I tried to call for you… but the intercom … it …" she whimpered into his ear as he held her.

James helped his wife to her feet as she clung to him. Madison stood speechless, careful not to step on the fallen medical equipment. As soon as Catherine stood up fully a strong sharp cramping pain tore into her abdomen. She lurched over with a hand beneath her belly and yelped in pain. James became frightened again as a pained expression came over his wife's face, her fist tightening around the fabric of his coat at his shoulder.

"James… the baby," she gasped and looked up to him with fear as Madison rushed to her side. "Shit, James, the baby's coming."

Paladin Cross had a team assembled in the Memorial basement, stalking the halls with weapons raised and a strict silence about them. Hell seemed to break loose in those narrow halls. The battle raged on from outside with eerie sounds of combat approaching as screams erupted from the small medical room. There had been no choice in the matter, no time left to evacuate. Catherine had quickly gone into labor as James was practically climbing the walls.

James fumbled over imported medical equipment from upstairs with trembling hands. Catherine screamed behind him. Madison recognized his uncharacteristic hysteria and squeezed his wrist.

"James, relax, she…" she attempted to sway him from panic, but he cut her off.

"How can I relax, Madison?" he snapped, not looking at her and shook his head, "She doesn't even have time for an epidural… how can she be eight centimeters already?" he turned to Madison with anguish in his facial features, his large grey eyes exploring her face for any form of positive advice.

Doctor Li stared up at her close friend with a vacant expression, frozen for a moment. She had never seen him this way; James had always been calm and collected.

"The birth will be quicker this way, yes, but don't worry James, I'm sure everything will go smoothly." She partially lied. Madison Li had never delivered a baby before and she never thought she would. "She's healthy and so is the baby, all the tests came back fine. Everything will go smoothly."

James didn't reply and glanced back over to his wife as she squirmed upon the table like someone was stabbing her from all directions. The father-to-be then looked back to his close friend and took in a breath for strength.

James nodded. "Pray to God it does."

Madison followed him back over to the medical bed with her eyes down as she adjusted her white latex gloves. Catherine didn't notice them approach as she moaned in pain. They had just enough time to get her into a white gown before her water broke. It was happening too immediately for James. His nightmares finally had come to life.

Catherine called for him as she shifted upon the thin white covers, the rushed contractions raging now. Pain beat her, dragging from hip to hip, strong and wicked. The beeping of the various machines rhythmically collided with her screams, as the white light above the bed seemed to amplify every little detail of this never to be forgotten event.

"James! James…" Catherine cried as he came to her. She clawed at him, clinging to his body while panting. "James, what if something happened? What if something is wrong with the baby? Tell me everything will be alright… tell me nothing's wrong, please James, please help me." She whimpered.

James watched his wife struggle and moan as he let her finish her incoherent ramble. Her skin was glazed with sweat, her dark hair wild and beginning to curl from the heat. Her cheeks were flushed pink as her glassy bright blue eyes pleaded to him.

"Listen to me, Cathy," he began and took her pretty face in his hands, "Everything _will_ be alright. I promise. It's going to be wonderful… you're going to be wonderful. I know you can do this, Catherine."

His wife smiled jadedly in between contractions and studied his face in that moment which felt like forever. As if she could read his mind, Catherine touched her husband's lips with her fingertips and tightened her grasp on his shoulder.

"I love you, James." She replied in a breathy whisper and James suddenly felt a deep, sinking pit in his stomach as if that was the final time he'd ever hear those pleasant words.

"I love you, Catherine."

She leaned back and released him, yet never took her sapphire stare off the man she loved with all her being. "Bad timing, huh?" she grinned as she panted.

James furrowed his brow lightly with a quick smile. "Never."

"James…" Madison called for assistance with the preparation and he strode over to her, but not before smiling warmly at his wife.

"Yes, Madison?" he answered soberly.

Doctor Li glanced to Cathy while still preparing materials robotically. "It is progressing very quickly, she'll want to push soon."

Anna entered the room then, also equipped with gloves and a medical smock. She didn't look anyone in the face and simply went over to the heart monitor. Anna watched Catherine's and the baby's heart beats carefully. It wasn't long until the contractions were only seconds apart.

Catherine moaned as Madison told her to put her feet up in the stirrups of the bed. "I wanna push!" she was screaming as James came to his wife's side, "I have to push! Oh, James, this baby wants out today!" she said to him and laughed through the pain for a moment. The pressure was aching her on, pulling at her like powerful cruel hands.

"Go ahead, Cat, you can push now." Madison replied her restrained voice slightly muffled through the white surgical mask. James had his pulled down around his neck as he grabbed his wife's hand in his.

As soon as she heard those words Catherine squeezed her husband's hand and pushed. It came naturally, she realized, yet the tarring pain was nearly unbearable. She shrieked through her teeth, pulse racing. Her body ached, as it was nearly impossible to breathe. James kept his hand in hers no matter how tightly she squeezed, his heart pounding in a rage against his ribs.

After a few more pushes Catherine fell back against the white sheets and pillow, exhaustion nearly taking her. "I need an epidural!" she screamed at her young husband with a glare, "Fuck! Look what you did! This is all your fault! I hate you!" she sobbed.

"Cathy…" James tried to speak to her calmly, but she bit his head off.

"I hate you! Shit!" she yelled, her voice high pitched and strained.

"Catherine, you need to focus on your pushing," Madison said, as Anna seemed to be in La-La Land.

"Fuck you too!" Catherine shouted and threw down again in her pushing. The pain was intensifying.

She pushed for another five minutes, screaming as tears rolled down her pretty face. "The baby's crowning…" Catherine heard Madison say as she gazed up to her husband in fear and extreme anguish.

She felt as if she were being torn in two with fire all around her, burning her body into nothing. "James, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it!" she called, trembling.

James smiled lovingly at her with a light laugh. "Don't worry, Cathy, I don't mind."

Catherine had lost track how many times she sat up to push or for how long, her body tensing. The room was swimming with black pulsating spots suddenly twisting as something in her core shifted, falling. She thought she'd die from the pain. She fell back against the cushions, nausea rising up.

"James…" she tried to call but slipped into unconsciousness.

Madison froze as James grabbed her shoulders. He knew something was very wrong then, his heart skipping a beat. "Catherine?" She shouldn't have lost consciousness, he thought in his rushing mind, this isn't right. His young wife laid there for a few moments then regained awareness with a pained moan.

Madison looked to him and they shared a thought quickly as Catherine sat up again to push. He tried to force that worry aside and focus on the now.

"Keep pushing, Cat," Madison said, her voice now expressing a faint anxiousness, "All you have to do is get past the shoulders now, that's it."

Cathy nodded and grabbed her knees, pushing with all her might. She screamed, an agonizing heart-retching cry. As if everything boiled up to this one moment focused on one second, one brief point, a strong force yanked and tore at her.

"…wide shoulders…" she heard Madison say to James.

James left her side and accompanied Madison in this instant. She was stuck in a silent scream, her mind vacant of everything except the pain. Suddenly, as if the world ceased moving, the pressure released as the pain was no more. Catherine fell back against the bed in what felt like slow motion to her. A wave of relief and sheer joy took her as her body relaxed and melted into the cushions.

James cut the umbilical cord quickly as Madison cleaned the baby up and let breath enter the lungs for the first time. James was stunned and moved as if his body wasn't connected to his brain any longer.

"It's a boy," he heard himself say as Cathy tried to sit up and see over them. "It's a boy, Catherine."

"Oh James," she nearly sobbed and leaned to see clearly yet all she could see was something small being wrapped in a blue blanket and placed in her husband's arms. James' face was filled with worry, surprise, and wonderment all at once.

"Is he okay, James?" Catherine called with a cringing heart as breath left and came to her quickly, "Why isn't he crying? James…"

Anna came over now as Madison also stood very close to James' side, simply staring. Catherine could physically feel her heart constricting. She wanted to scream, swear at them in that moment for not allowing her to see, yet she sat frozen with a held breath.

"_Shhhh_…" James hushed softly, holding the infant in his arms gently, grey gaze locked upon the baby's small sweet face.

Suddenly, the infant moved slightly and opened his eyes. All the women in the room just gasped. A pair of brilliant bright blue eyes stared up at James and the world slowed. James' heart beat a warm rush through his body in this moment. He had never been more in love. Catherine watched as her husband's face softened, love was shown in his eyes in the most clear of ways. He just melted into that little boy. The infant furrowed his little brow and watched James' calmly as if reading his mind.

"James…" Cathy called gently and he came to her without removing his eyes from his newborn son.

Catherine held out her arms and took the child almost anxiously as James smiled. She held the infant close to her chest, the light blue blanket soft in her arms. James watched as they simply stared at one another for what felt like an eternity. He saw that immediate connection, beautiful and vivid. He had never seen his wife so in love than she was right then. Her features were peaceful and stunning with glowing blue eyes. They seemed to be studying each other as if telepathically speaking, attached to the soul.

"He's perfect, James." He heard her say in a whisper. "Castiel," she spoke so softly, the newborn at peace in her arms, in love, "I'm your momma, you're going to make me so proud." She seemed to sing.

James felt warm tears fall down his face; he had never been so blissful, so content. Her words wouldn't strike his heart until later, wouldn't make sense to him until years after.

"Oh, James…" she nearly sobbed and reached up to touch his cheek, noticing his tears. He saw her big glassy eyes form large delighted tears, which rolled down her face.

Madison found herself smiling and crying at the same time. "Congratulations."

James practically sobbed. "Thank you."

Catherine giggled with joy. "Look at his eyes," she cooed, stroking the infant's dark damp hair, "So handsome."

"Maybe they'll change." James said, knowing that babies' eyes usually did after a few months.

"Never, they'll never change." she replied and gazed back up to her husband. James leaned and kissed her. He'd forever remember that kiss, pure and with endless love. He would remember her soft warm lips, her smooth skin, and the sweet scent of her raven hair.

"We did it, Cathy," James grinned, "He's a big boy isn't he."

"Nine pounds three ounces." Madison added as Anna wiped tears from her face.

"Damn…" Anna said with a happy laugh. "He'll be tall alright."

"Like his daddy." Catherine chirped and looked back to the newborn. "Tall and handsome… how's that sound, Castiel?"

The baby made a cute little cooing noise as if answering her and had his little hands tangled in her long hair. For James, it all began to happen in slow motion. He ignored the jump and alarming beeping of the heart monitor. He couldn't understand.

Catherine began to breathe oddly as if she couldn't get the air in her lungs quick enough. Fear came over her features. "James… James…"

He furrowed his brow, gaze shifting to the monitor and back to his young wife, as she seemed to be struggling. "Catherine?"

She could no longer call out for him as her eyes fluttered back. James reacted quickly. He took the infant from her and handed him over to Madison whom was just as startled as he.

"Get the baby out of here!" he ordered and motioned to Anna for assistance. "She's going into cardiac arrest! Get the defibrillator!" he nearly screamed as he could now hear his son begin to cry from afar as Madison wheeled him away.

"No!" Catherine managed to call out, her arms outstretched for her baby. "No, James, I…"

"Catherine, listen to me, it's going to be okay… Cathy?" he tried to calm her yet she only looked to him in terror.

She suddenly lashed out and grabbed him by the collar of his coat. "James, keep him safe," she cried as he was forced to lean over her as she clung to him, "Save him…"

Blood poured from her as she jolted back in the bed, struggling, as her body seemed to convulse. James rushed with shaking hands to stop it all, but the monitor suddenly went flat line in a long dreadful ringing note.

"No!" he cried and jerked forward.

He watched as he lovely wife fell limp against the white of the sheets, her head lolling to the side as her one hand slipped off the table. James took the defibrillator from Anna's grasp in a quick strong motion. He tore the medical gown at his wife's chest open quickly, her breasts now exposed, but it didn't matter. He had to save her, bring her back.

"Clear!" he called as Anna widened her bleak brown eyes.

"Wait!" she yelled and pushed a few buttons on the machine.

"Hurry, God damn it!" James screamed.

"Charging," she said, wild eyes locked to the device. "Alright, clear!"

"Clear!" he shouted again and brought the tool down on her.

James saw his wife's body rise to the machine yet still fall lifeless after the shock was administered. "Again!" he called as the charge rose up.

The Earth began to spin slower. He suddenly felt as if he were watching himself on an old television screen. As a young devoted doctor, he saw his quick movements, his pained expression. Nothing was working, nothing. She, the young scientist, simply lay there, unresponsive, dead. He saw her body repeatedly jump to the machine, the noise of the electric shock beginning to burn into his brain. The ringing note of the heart monitor grasped his heart like a powerful hand of fate.

James could suddenly see the first moment they met. He saw her gorgeous face, her large bashful smile. He saw them working together next, the way they watched each other, like speaking through body movements. He saw himself proposing to her, oh, the grin of joy on her lips, the way she flung her arms up around his neck. He saw them making love, tossing and turning in those beige sheets. He saw them dancing to an old Elvis song, alone and tipsy. He saw her say she was pregnant, saw that twinkle in her sapphire eyes. He saw her holding her baby, saw her cry with love.

That life flashed before his eyes like a strike of lightning as he tossed the defibrillator to the floor. It had burned her skin. It crashed at his side as he put his hands on her, counting. He gave her breath, yet her chest would not rise. James felt his breath stolen as he pressed down on her over and over. Nothing else mattered; the rest of the Earth was blurred, as his world lay dead before him.

"C'mon baby!" he screamed at the dead woman, "C'mon baby, oh, baby, please…" James pleaded and ignored those tears that dripped off his chin and into her hair. "Cathy, baby…please…"

He had lost count, lost time. He felt his arms ache with pain, his back throbbing, and his heart beat sharply. "James…" he heard a distant female voice say.

James let a sob escape and fell, his head rested on her chest. He felt hands touch him but he shoved them away. He wept and gazed down at his bride, his lover, and the mother of his child.

The way she lay, the way she had died almost appeared beautiful. Her long raven hair was feathered out upon the white pillow delicately as if she were under water. Her skin was growing pale like porcelain, her lovely body now still and doll-like. Her large opaque sapphire eyes stared off into oblivion yet seemed empty. Her pink lips were slightly parted as if speaking his name one last time.

James licked his lips as his tears ran over his mouth. He took her left hand first and placed it over her chest, then the other. He fixed the gown in a gentle way so she was no longer exposed. With glassy eyes and tears falling like rain he reached up and closed her eyes, his hand against her soft face.

"I love you, Catherine… baby." He whimpered and kissed her forehead. As if a piece of life was stolen from him he fell. He hit the floor with his knees then leaned back on his legs and let his head fall forward.

"James…" he heard that voice again and glanced up to see Madison before him also seated in the floor. She had tear tracks down her face as well.

It was over now. A part of his life was missing, torn out, and nothing could heal that wound.

Cross had agreed to lead him there. The vault would be a new unwanted home to which a journey would take only but a few days. He needed to go, to escape.

"You're leaving, James?" Madison said behind him as he vacantly stared out a grey window of the Memorial. Rain came down viscously. It beat against the metal and glass of the window, creating rough pockets in the dark sand. The water in the river jumped to it. The dark skies bled it.

"Yes, to a vault nearby. It's 101, I believe." He replied, his voice dismal and depressing.

"But, James, what about the Project?" Madison questioned, yet he could hear that underlying sadness in her voice.

"It's yours now, I wish the best of luck to you." He said and watched the rain trace lines of water down the glass.

"James!" she shouted, "You cannot abandon us! This will all fall apart if you do not…"

"Then let it," he cut her off, "I'm sorry, but I don't care for this Project anymore, Madison. Like I said, it's yours now, best of luck." James heard his son cry from another room, a frantic upset cry of a newborn. Madison couldn't reply. James tilted his head to the side. "Bring me my son, Madison. We're leaving… forever."

_One Year Later_

Vault 101. The underground shelter wasn't exactly what he expected, but now it was home, a bottomless dark dismal home. Only a little over a year had passed, but James still had fallen into a deep sinking depression. The vault was cold and dim, dreary in more ways than one. The bleak bitter halls wouldn't lead him back to her. The blue lights within the steel walls wouldn't reflect her sapphire gaze. The distant sun wouldn't fall over her porcelain skin, wouldn't paint wonders in her raven hair. The woman he loved was dead and James felt as if he had died as well.

He knew that he had partially come to vault 101 for escape, yet the other reason was to fulfill his wife's last wish, to keep their son safe. James wanted so badly for her to hold her baby again, to see her son take his first steps, to hear him say 'mamma' for the first time. Instead it was 'daddy' and only daddy.

At times James felt it hard to look at his son. The little boy resembled her too distinctly. Her blue eyes, her dark, dark hair, her soft skin all were all weaved into that little boy. He also saw himself in his son and that both gave him pride and frightened him. Now and then James would watch him, adoring the way his son looked at him, the love and admiration his son showered him with. James could get lost in those baby-blues, fall into those sapphire skies.

James shifted in his rigid wheeled chair and found it difficult to stare at the multiple medical charts on his desk anymore. Even when absent from his newly appointed office he could never escape from his work. The Overseer of the vault had agreed to appoint him the main medical doctor of vault 101, yet James occasionally wished he hadn't.

In his apartment room James sat at a small desk beside his bed. His son's crib was across the way, beside a playpen with numerous toys scattered about. His son sat quietly on the carpeted floor of the playpen like a little angel. He was calm for a baby and perhaps more focused and insightful than any other child his age.

James turned his chair slightly and glanced over at the small boy. The child was such a cute little thing, his baby, his pal. James grinned to himself as he watched his son play with tiny red and blue toy cars. He felt bad putting him in that cage-like contraption, but then he wouldn't have to watch him so closely, constantly checking what he had stuck into his mouth. James laughed to himself. Warmth spilt into his core when he was in his son's presence, and somehow, for the briefest moment, everything wasn't so terrible anymore.

"Castiel." James called soothingly to the baby and immediately was struck with those giant blue eyes. James smiled wider and winked at the little boy. "What cha doing?"

His son smiled at him with a coo of happiness and held up a plastic car. The name was his wife's idea. She loved the meaning of it and the way it sounded, strong and unique, bold and handsome. 'It's quite dashing, James', he could even hear her sweet voice; 'We can call him Cas for short! Isn't that charming? Oh, it's perfect!' At first James didn't like it very much, but as soon as he saw his son for the first time, held him in his arms, the name fit him entirely. It had taken on a new meaning and suddenly was lovely to his ears.

"Daddy, car!" he chirped excitedly. "Red car! Blue!"

"Interesting… looks like fun." James laughed lightly, yet sobered when the door to his apartment slid open.

"Hello, James." The woman greeted very cheerfully which made him want to puke. Beatrice was around his age with short champagne tinted hair, brown eyes, and a typical beauty, plain perhaps. She was also tall and slender. James knew she only wanted to help him out, but he soon found her to be annoying along with the additional crush she had on him.

"Good morning." He responded dismally and spun back to his work.

"How have you been sleeping?" she asked and he could feel her eyes at his back. "This little angel keeping you up?"

"Yes, almost every hour he wakes up." James groaned and rubbed his eyes. "It's tiring."

"Aw!" she exclaimed in a gush and turned to the baby in the pen. "You've been giving daddy a hard time?" she giggled and began to baby-talk his son, James hated that.

Castiel stood with a smile and held onto the gate of the playpen in order to stay standing. Beatrice was beginning to get on James' unpleasant side. "Hello there! Hello, Blue-eyes! You're so cute, yes you are! So handsome!" she purred and James rolled his reddened grey eyes.

He has a name, idiot; James felt like saying yet picked up his pencil again and began to scribble on another chart.

"Hello." Castiel replied sweetly, he liked to talk almost all the time. He loved to learn.

Her voice quieted for a second and James sighed. "James, what's he doing?" Beatrice asked.

James glanced over his shoulder and through the corner of his eye. His son was being bashful with her, twirling his dark hair and grinning like a little James Bond. James couldn't help but smile to himself. His son was an early lady-killer and he knew it.

"He's flirting with you." James answered bluntly and turned back to his boring desk.

She gasped with another giggle. "Oh! You little flirt!"

Castiel held out his little arms for her and excitedly awaited her to pick him up with a jumping motion and a thrilled squeal. Beatrice picked him up from beneath the arms and propped him against her hip. James spun in the chair and stood like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.

"Are you sure you're doing okay, James?" Beatrice asked.

James nodded. "I'm fine." He lied and watched his son play so delicately with her hair, touch her face. He loved people, their faces, and he especially loved women. Perhaps he longed for a mother figure, James thought, he had his theories.

"Good, I'm glad." Beatrice smiled and laughed as Castiel continued to charm her. "I hope you are."

"Hair," Castiel cooed, "Face."

"I am." He replied miserably.

She sighed, hoping he would open up to her. "Well, see you after work. Say bye-bye to daddy," she said as James felt distressed, "Let's go see what the other kids are doing, huh?"

James watched her turn and stride toward the door. She had recently started to come every morning to pick Castiel up and bring him to daycare with the other children. She did this to make it easier on James. Castiel was looking back at him from over her shoulder and suddenly waved back to his father.

"Bye-bye, daddy." He said and had those baby blues locked on him like glue.

James' stomach flipped as his heart dropped. "Wait!" he called and went after her. Beatrice turned back to him in question. "You know what, um, I'll take him. It's really not a big deal, I can go to work right after, it's on the way."

"Oh, of course." She grinned and handed the little boy over to his father.

Castiel immediately shot his arms out for his father, nearly leaping out of her grasp excitedly. James took him and held him as if he were saying good-bye forever. Castiel melted into his father's embrace, wrapping his little arms around his neck and leaning his head on James' shoulder.

"Aw!" Beatrice gushed. "You wanted your daddy."

James grinned. Castiel was the light of his life, the meaning in his shattered world. "He's tired." James stated, noticing how his son would wake crying during the night like he had some horrible nightmare, yet wanted nothing more than to just sleep next to his father, to be held. "I think he's been having nightmares. He hasn't been talking as much recently either."

"Oh that's ridiculous, James. Babies are all the same, they don't know… "

James cut her off, growing all the more irritated with her. "He's not. I think he knows something's wrong. I believe that it might have something to do with his…"

James stopped himself at the thought of his wife, the mother of his child. He didn't want to talk about her and definitely not to Beatrice. She knew what he was hinting at and lowered her gaze in the awkwardness.

"You know that you can always talk to me, James." She said after a second. "Even Jonas, of course, I'm sure everything will work out."

James nodded. "Thank you, Beatrice." He replied with a false gratitude as Castiel watched him with clever eyes as if he knew exactly what they were talking about.

"Have a wonderful day, James!" she responded almost too chipper for his taste. "And you too, Sweetie-pie!" She said to Cas with a wave, but he still had his gaze locked on his father with a soberness that was beyond him. The expression on his little face harbored such an intuitive manner of emotion, intelligent.

James sighed as she strode through his door. He looked to his son whom was still staring at him as if he were reading his mind. "I don't really like her much either, pal. She seems to pry too much."

"Pry too much." Cas repeated in almost perfect pronunciation.

James smiled and Castiel beamed, mimicking him, a toothless grin. "Well, daddy has to go to work now but I'm sure you'll have fun with Amata and Freddy today. Just have fun, son. No worries, Cas, no worries."

_Four Years Later_

James pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes shut. Working in the vault clinic was probably one of the most boring activities he'd ever had to endure. Nothing more serious than sniffles and twisted ankles ever entered through that bizarre automated steel door. A part of him missed the wastes, the danger of it all, and the excitement. However, down in vault 101 the young doctor now succumbed to family life, or what was left of his small family.

His now well-trained ears picked up on a light scamper in the hallway, running. The source of all the noise caused the door to slide open and with little shoes hitting the floor loudly, the child stopped right in front of him. James sighed and straightened in his chair, glancing down to boy standing before him.

His son stared up at him with the brightest eyes he'd ever seen, his wife's eyes, sapphire-blue and beautiful. The boy of about five years of age looked to his father as if he was reading every thought in his tired mind. He was an adorable child, with a handsome little face and short soft raven hair. He was slightly tall for his age but never was too slim or overweight.

Both women and men of the vault would regularly come to James and inform him on how delightful his son was. How cute, how smart, how polite, how charming he was. James would frequently catch his son flirting with an adult woman whom would fall right into his trap, captured by those big baby blues, the long dark eyelashes. He was a regular Casanova, an early ladies' man. James couldn't help but laugh and adore his son all the more. He knew he would be a good-looking, pleasant guy when full grown. The ladies loved him from birth.

James suddenly remembered when his son was just born and all the women in the room gasped when he had opened his eyes for the first time. He didn't even cry, a little angel.

"What is it, Cas?" James asked and pushed papers into a neat pile on his desk.

"Dad?" he began, little voice joyful, but posing a possible discerning question.

"Yes?" James replied with fatigue dripping from his deep voice, yet wasn't looking at him.

"Daaaaaaad?" he called with a giggle.

"Yes, Castiel? What is it?" James snapped slightly and gritted his teeth while over-folding his paperwork.

"Why are you so sad?" Castiel asked sweetly and bit his lip.

James froze and looked back to the boy in wonder. "I'm not sad, pal."

"Yes you are."

"And why do you think that?" James asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Because your eyes told me." Cas replied quickly and inched closer to his father, little hands behind his back as if he were an adult persuading him into a job offer.

James stared at his son in absolute admiration and perhaps shock. He was always doing little things like that, little things that surprised James. He had always been that way, an intellectual.

Castiel wasn't like most children his age. He was a conversationalist; able to form perfect complete words by the time he was a year and a half. He loved to talk and in the most hysterical ways. He occasionally got on James' nerves when he wouldn't shut up. Cas had funny little theories and stories about even the most simplest of ideas, some ideas that seemed beyond him, beyond what he could see. He, of course, would laugh at the common childish jokes like farting or any form of slapstick humor, but what stunned James most of all was his ability to comprehend adult humor. When James and Jonas would joke around he would discover his son laughing at their puns and fully understanding every word said. James was convinced he was a psychic. Castiel constantly seemed to know exactly what emotion his father was feeling at any moment he noticed every detail.

James sighed again and stood from the wheeled chair then bent down to his son's level. He gazed into those eyes, his wife's eyes, and a faint smile graced his lips. "Daddy, just feels sad sometimes because he misses you all day long." He replied gently.

Castiel smiled with an eye roll, flashing his white teeth, some missing however. "I missed you too, Dad."

James scooped him up with ease and placed the child on his desk. "Well tell me then," he said with an enchanting smile, "What did you do today?"

Castiel looked up to the ceiling in thought, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, his wife's smirk. "Well," he began and looked back to his father with a twinkle in his eye, "Today me and Amata read some books and drawed on the board and ate sugar cookies."

"Hmm," James narrowed his eyes with joy beginning to surface once again, he stole his heart. "That sounds interesting. What kind of books did you read?"

"Um I kinda just looked at the pictures, but I really tried to read the words this time, honest!"

James laughed which caused Cas to giggle. "What did you do today, Daddy?" he asked and took James' glasses from his coat pocket, careful not to touch the lenses.

James also never baby-talked his son like most parents. He always treated him with respect and confided in him. "Well," James began, mimicking his son, "Today I sat at the desk then ate lunch then sat some more. Then, guess what?"

"What?" Cas chirped excitedly, looking at him through the glasses that were too big for his face.

"I sat some more… then! Mister Gomez came in with a cut on his hand so I stitched him up and he was all better."

"Was there lots of blood?" Castiel asked with that smirk again, a mischievous grin.

"Castiel!"

"What? That's what peoples got inside them. I know that. All over inside them! All over!" he said and did a little fidgeting dance.

James cracked up and picked his son up beneath the arms and held him close. He wrapped his little arms around his neck. He was still young enough to be held and remain careless, contented.

"You're absolutely right." James replied and ruffled his son's hair as Cas placed his father's glasses back into his coat pocket with such care. "Thank you."

Castiel giggled then seemed to become very excited. "Jonas!"

"There's the big man!" Jonas called, walking into the clinic, white lab coat bright under the fluorescent lighting.

Jonas had become James' best friend among the clones. Sometimes, James believed he was his only companion, besides Cas of course. Jonas was a tall man with dark brown eyes hidden behind thick glasses, mocha skin, and a contagious smile. He was slightly younger than James and would, in private, ask him about the Wastes and listen intently like a child listening to a fantasy story. He respected James for that and loved him as a brother along with his son, he loved that kid. He was like an uncle to Castiel and teased him just like he would to any family member.

Castiel squirmed in James' arms until he put him down. He ran over to Jonas with a huge smile. "Guess what, Jonas!"

"What?" the medic asked and bent down to his level.

"You eat poop."

"You little greaser! I most certainly do not!" he bellowed with a laugh and scooped Castiel up by the waist and held him beneath his arm like he was lugging a box of equipment. "Oh no, James. I think we need to take out the trash!"

"No! No!" Cas giggled hysterically and wriggled in Jonas' grasp. "Not the garbage!"

James laughed, he was beginning to feel much better. Jonas had a way of charming people. "Here, let me just stuff you in this wastebasket here." He chuckled, "You're small enough, you can fit."

"No!" Cas giggled harder as Jonas held him upside down now, "Then I'll fall down the hole in the cave and go to China!"

Jonas and James cracked up hard. "What?" Jonas exclaimed laughing like a lunatic.

"I don't think it's possible for you to end up in China, Cas." James laughed.

Cas looked up to his father while hanging upside down and became serious. "No! China is on the other side of the Earth! I know that. And if you go through the Earth you can get there!" he smiled. "Me and Freddy figured that out today!"

"Darn, I wanna do that." Jonas replied and put Cas back on the floor.

"Me too," James said, grinning at his son as Cas giggled and wrapped himself around Jonas' leg like a monkey. "We all should go to China sometime then."

"Yes, we should, Dad!" Castiel chirped and held on tighter to Jonas' leg as he attempted to walk. "We're going on an adventure!"

"Great, now I've got a leech on my leg." The medical assistant said.

"An adventure?" James marveled, "Hopefully it's an adventure to the cafeteria because it's dinner time, pal."

"Oh poop… that's a dumb adventure." Castiel replied glumly, not prepared to eat the same old thing all over again. He wanted a change, something new and not just with his food. He wanted an _adventure_.

_Twelve Years Later…_

James once again was examining his grays in the mirror. Well it was more looking into the reflection of himself in the dreary window across the way. His dark hair was sprayed with highlights of the color; his thick goatee was sprinkled with silver. At least he still had his thick hair though, James thought, could be worse. He felt old even though he had just entered his late-forties. He was beginning to get more and more wrinkles. His son was a full-blown teenager and gave him headaches. James was bored with his vault life and felt as if something needed to change.

The doctor was sitting all by his lonesome in the 50's styled cafeteria, a soft hum of a familiar Elvis Presley song played in the background from the old jukebox. The red booth had some sticky and crummy spots along with the blue table he had his elbows rested on. He was supposed to meet Jonas there for lunch, but came a little early. He needed time to think. Consider all the faults and advantages of his plan with Jonas.

James took another sip of his scotch in an iceless glass as quick footsteps darted toward the cafeteria. A young woman rounded the corner, wide-eyed and out of breath. Amata had grown into a pretty young lady, with large brown eyes, lovely dark mahogany hair, and soft tanned skin. James could tell why his son was so fond of her.

James knew that they fooled around. When he was that age he did the same and he knew his son was just as hot-blooded and confident as he. James just hoped that they used protection. He had told Cas before that he didn't want little copies of him running around, not just yet. He knew he could trust his son.

Amata rushed over to him and began to speak very fast and James stared at the Overseer's daughter confusion. "Amata, slow down and relax."

She took in a breath and began to rub her arms in alarm and irritation; she didn't relax. "Cas … he and Butch… they… Oh my God, I'm so pissed… Butch started it and those damn Tunnel Snakes cheered them on… and there was blood… gross, so gross… and …"

James was suddenly glad he didn't have a daughter; he couldn't understand what she was blabbing about. "Amata, please just tell me what happened, slowly." James replied, "Is Cas alright?"

The young woman growled and turned toward the exit as she attempted to calm herself. Just as she turned, a figure walking past stopped in the doorway with wide eyes, frozen and not expecting people to be in the room. Freddy Gomez gasped as Amata caught a glimpse of him.

"Oh shit!" Freddy screamed and ran down the hall and out of view.

Amata took off after him yelling. "Freddy! Freddy get back here! I can't believe you…"

As their voices faded down the corridor along with heavy footsteps James rolled his grey eyes and finished his glass of scotch, he just about ready for another. Suddenly the other automated door behind him slid open and he hoped it was Jonas.

"Sup, Dad." His son greeted casually and sat across the booth, the red seat squeaked beneath him. He propped his feet up on a chair beside the booth, stretching out his long legs and crossed his ankles.

James sighed. Castiel grinned through the side of his mouth at him with a half empty bottle of Nuka Cola in his hand. At seventeen James' son was filling out quickly, not as skinny as years prior. He was putting on more muscle weight, as his face grew longer, his body becoming sturdier. He was maturing into an attractive young adult almost too quickly for his father. James thought he'd never stop growing taller. His son was now as tall as he and still going. James could still remember when he was small enough to be held and, at times, he wished he could have stayed that way.

"What did you do, Castiel?" James asked in a harsh tone, brow creasing.

Cas froze with the soda bottle at his lips as he met his father's aggravated glare with widening eyes. "Nothin'… I uh…well it's kind of a long story, Dad…"

"I'd like to know." James retorted with strict grey eyes. "Get your feet down." He said and Cas sat up properly in the booth.

"Dad…"

James cut him off. "Amata came in here very disturbed, rambling about something concerning Butch and yourself."

"Shit…" Cas muttered under his breath as his father awaited his explanation.

"Alright alright," he began, as he pulled at the small silver hoop in his left ear. James didn't particularly like that he had pierced his own ear or listened to his girlfriend in doing so. "So I kinda sorta accidentally got into a little disagreement with Butch."

"Yes, I know that much." James responded and crossed his arms, "Explain yourself."

Castiel put his hands up in defense then ran one through his dark hair. He had been styling his hair differently since his was fifteen. Most of the boys in the vault had copied each other with that typical 50's greaser cut. His son's hair was slicked back loosely as it curled slightly at the back of neck with longish sideburns.

"Like I said, we just tussled, that's it, nothing too bad." Cas wiped a smear of blood from his chin with the thought and propped his elbows on the table, "C'mon, Dad, you know he's a asshole. I just ruffed him up a bit, besides he was screwing with Amata again, she got upset so I … uh we butted heads… ya know, like good old times…she's my girl, ya know, and I don't like him sayin' shit like that to her…him and his gay little gang…"

James rolled his eyes and let his son ramble. "You broke his nose, didn't you?"

Castiel took in a breath then rolled his shoulders. "Yeah…"

James laughed internally, but attempted to stay serious. "How'd I guess?" he replied sarcastically and stole his son's soda bottle. "You should just ignore him."

"Guess you know me that well." Cas laughed, "Man, I try though…"

James took a swig of the cola and flinched to the extra strong flavor. "You put whiskey in this?"

"Maybe… What? I was um _irritated_." Castiel replied and leaned back, putting his hands behind his head. "Tastes pretty good, right?"

James shrugged. "I would have added rum instead."

Both father and son cracked up and Cas picked up his father's empty glass. "Look's like you spiking you drinks too, Pops."

Before James could reply the door Cas had came from opened again. James watched his son put on a charming grin, yet straighten in his seated position.

"Hey." He greeted easily and James knew who exactly walked through that door.

Amata strode over to her boyfriend and slapped his arm hard. "_Ow_!" Cas flinched and looked up to her in question. "What was that for?"

"Sorry, but your son is an idiot." Amata said to James and crossed her arms, standing there on one hip.

"I know…" James replied quietly and took another sip of his son's drink.

"What? You're siding with her?" Castiel exclaimed with a hint of humor in his voice.

"You shouldn't have egged him on, Cas, you know how Butch gets." Amata explained without removing her glare from her boyfriend.

"What? I didn't egg him on, what are you talking about, Sweetheart?" Castiel replied smugly as his tongue played between his teeth quickly.

"Shut up, Cas! I was there! I saw what happened! You guys are always doing this! Can't you just ignore him?" Amata whined.

"I agree." James said quickly.

Now Castiel frowned at his father as if he were a small child again. "He's an asshole! I can't just sit there listen to him rip me a new one!"

Amata sighed and put her hand up to her forehead. "I appreciate you sticking up for me, but just … aggh boys…"

Castiel was quiet for a while then shrugged his shoulders. "Fine, I'll just sit there like a tard."

Amata smiled with a laugh and hugged him. "Thanks! You're such a good boyfriend!" she chirped and kissed him on the cheek.

"Yeah, yeah," he replied and stole his drink back from his father, "Now go harass Freddy."

"Exactly what I was planning." She smiled and squeezed his shoulder before she departed. "Oh, bye, uh, Doctor James!"

Once she left through the door she had entered from Cas looked back to James with an arched eyebrow. "Doctor James?" he laughed.

James shrugged. "Whatever works, I suppose. It's polite."

Cas scoffed and drank the last of his mixed drink. "Women…"

"You always loved them."

"No I didn't."

"Yes, you did," James said as Cas grinned, "Since before I could remember."

"They obviously don't _always_ love me… well you know…" Cas said and blew into the bottle to make a low ship's horn like noise.

They heard the door release from the Atrium and looked back to see Jonas enter with a platter of food. "What? Did I miss something?"

_Two Years Later_

The hall of the Jefferson Memorial seemed to be glowing. A certain radiance emanated from the steel like it had its own life source, they seemed to breathe even. The lighting was dim, yet blurry like a white creamy veil over his eyes. Sounds bounced about in illogical echoes. Voices seemed close, but far away.

James felt disembodied as he walked those halls like a perplexed phantom, weaving around corridors. With every step he took he could feel himself being pulled. He wandered down a staircase in the basement and suddenly recognized where he was. The force pulled him into the small medical room as his heart trembled. Yet, as he entered that space nothing was as it should be. The medical equipment was stapled to the ceiling; the bed with those white covers was stuck perfectly to the ceiling. It was as if he were walking upside-down. It was so silent now.

"James…" he heard a female voice call to him suddenly, the tone calm and beckoning. "James…. James…" again and again it called in a soft breathy echo, moments apart.

The voice, of an angel it seemed, was right on top of him now summoning him. James pivoted on his heels so he was facing back toward the exit. There she was, his young beautiful wife. He recognized her immediately. Her long velvety raven hair was sleek and soft. Her face was alive and beautiful, just the way he remembered. Her big blue eyes seemed to burn holes into his skull. She was thin and dressed in white. At first he thought it was that medical gown, but when looking closer he realized she was in fact wearing a stunning white dress, simple and pure.

Catherine smiled at him and seemed to pace in slow circles around him. James felt as if he was bolted to the floor. His heart throbbed and head swam yet he was contented.

"Catherine?" he asked, his voice echoed into the walls.

"Hello, James." She replied sweetly, but really appeared to be staring at him intensely. As if she were reading his thoughts she never removed her blue gaze from his.

"I can't believe it's you…" he attempted to control his voice, "Even if this is a dream… I… miss you Cathy."

His dead wife floated slower now drifting between what he could see and could not. "James…" she beckoned again yet stricter this time. "Watch him, James…"

James furrowed his brow in confusion. "Watch who?" he asked and merely watched her. Something clicked in his brain as his stomach twisted with a cringe of doom. "Cas?" he asked, "What about Castiel, Catherine? Is he…?"

"James, watch him." She said again, "Watch him…"

He shook his head. "I don't understand…"

A slight sadness came over her features now, yet she would say nothing more. "Watch him, James, watch him…"

Everything seemed to be fading now and he knew he was waking up. "Cathy, wait!"

"Watch… him… James…" her sweet voice was weakening, "James…. James… James…."

"Dad?" suddenly the female voice transformed into a male tone and grew stronger. "Dad? Yo, Dad…"

James opened his grey eyes and instantly stared into a pair of sapphire oceans, the eyes so familiar and real, beautiful. Am I still sleeping, he thought? He gazed over the face before him in what seemed like slow motion. Her features, her spirit quickly faded and morphed into male features. Suddenly, James realized he was staring at his son and jolted back, now fully awake.

"Oh, Cas…" he mumbled and rubbed his eyes with a hand, propped up on one elbow in the bed. "What are you doing in here?" he asked and finally looked up to his adult son. Her essence was still there, the eyes, the dark, dark hair, the softness of the face, and so was his, James saw himself in his son. This startled him suddenly and he couldn't quite decide on the reason.

"Well, I thought I'd wake you up now," he began and shifted in his stance at the edge of his father's bed. "It's kinda late."

"What?" James asked, still jaded. "What time is it?"

Cas shrugged his broad shoulders. "Around one, one thirty." James noticed he was wearing that old leather jacket. When he was twenty or so, James recalled, he had received it as a birthday present from Catherine, she always loved men in leather jackets. He never really wore it that often, yet gave it to his son when he had turned twelve. It had always been too big for him, too bulky in the arms and too long lengthwise. Yet, now the dark jacket fit his son perfectly, he had it open in the front, the sides falling to just above his hips. He looked almost too old for James now, too mature.

James ran a hand down his face with a yawn. "Why did you let me sleep this late?" James questioned, but realized that was a strange inquiry.

"I figured you needed a break, doesn't everyone once in awhile?" he replied and seemed to be opening a pill case. "Here," he said, handing his father an Advil, "This should help. Trust me, I've had my fair share of hangovers." He snickered with that thought.

James frowned and took the medicine from his son. How did he know? "You shouldn't be giving me this, I should be giving it to you."

Castiel smirked through the right side of his mouth. "It's okay, Dad. I'm a big boy, I can take care of myself and, hey, you've been taking care of my ass for almost twenty years now. I think I can take care of my old man once in awhile." He laughed and looked back at James with adoration in his blue eyes. He had such a pleasant smile. "Besides, I think you've earned it."

James grinned back, a sad yet thankful grin and took the Advil with a glass of water he had on his nightstand. James looked at his son as he sat down in a green cushioned chair beside the bed. James studied him quickly in that moment. His son's twentieth birthday was fast approaching. Castiel was now about six foot three and fully filled out. His chest was broad with a masculine muscle tone and narrow hips. His jaw had grown, the features of his face more angular and handsome. He had decided to shave his facial hair uniquely as it curved down his chin a thin strip below his lower lip. He had almost lost his teenager attitude, yet with hints of it still hanging around along with that small silver earring that still hung from his left ear. He was confident and thoughtful, noble. James knew he certainly could take care of himself; he had his own apartment after all.

James thought of all this while watching the clear water twirl in his glass. Oh, the water. He glanced up because he felt the sting of eyes on him. Castiel was staring at him from his seated position on that chair. Studying him intensely as if reading his every thought. He always had done that, even as a small child. Catherine once had that same look in her eyes, a look that James could never decipher. He could never decide what it was. That look, what is it? What does he want? James wondered, knowing that if his wife was still alive, her and his son could probably stare at each other forever, communicating without words.

James had only seen it happen once, when she had held him in her arms for the first and last time. It was in the way they had watched one another that James wished Castiel could have known her, spoke with her, loved her like no other. A mother's love is a rare wonder, yet he never got to know. It was that look that was always difficult to make sense of, always painful yet passionate, Castiel shared that stare now. This frightened James at times, the vivid dream reentering his mind. Those eyes.

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?" James asked and put the glass back down.

"Sorry," he replied then bit his lip, breaking the stare, "It's just… it's like your planning something." He said and James froze.

Did he know? He couldn't have, James thought as his heart beat a little faster. "I … I'm not planning anything, son. I'm just tired."

Castiel shrugged again and scratched the back of neck in thought. "I know, oh, and, uh, don't worry I took over for you today, no worries."

James nodded. "Thank you, Cas." He replied and swung his legs over the side of the twin bed. "I guess I drank a little more than I should have last night." James muttered and remembered sneaking into the Overseer's office, hacking files and stumbling about.

"This wouldn't have anything to do with today being Mom's birthday would it?" Castiel said out of the blue and James' grey gaze flickered back over to him quickly then drifted away.

After he didn't answer him nor looked at him, Cas felt a twinge of grief. "Sorry," he added after a moment and lowered his gaze to his hands in his lap, "You know, um, I talk to her sometimes."

James now glanced over to his son in wonder and perhaps admiration. "You do, do you?"

"Yeah, you know, when I'm alone," he paused and looked back to his father and James could see that drip of sadness in his features, his deep voice wavered. "I'd like to think she can hear me."

James grinned warmly. "I speak to her too."

"Yeah?" Cas smiled now and shifted again, "What does she say?"

James hesitated, recalling the startling dream again and could almost hear her voice. _Watch him, James, watch him._ What did she mean, he wondered. "Nothing." He answered.

In that moment he saw that smile fade on his son's face, his features sobering as if that was not what he wanted to hear. "Well," Cas said and rose from the green chair, "I guess I'll see ya out there."

James' heart skipped a beat, as the air seemed to be paralyzed in his throat. "What?" he nearly barked, frightened and alarmed. He can't possibly know! Oh, God… "What did you say?"

Castiel turned back to his father with a frown of confusion on his face. He stopped short in the bedroom doorway. "What?" he asked in strong question, "I said, _I'll see ya out there_, you know in the hall or the clinic."

James attempted to calm himself, thinking he almost had a heart attack. He nodded then swallowed hard. "Yes, of course, the clinic…"

Castiel laughed almost awkwardly and worried about his father. "Are you sure you're okay, Dad?"

James took in a relaxed breath. "Yes, I'm fine, son." He laughed in the same way, "Don't worry about me, Castiel. I'll be just fine." He said yet froze internally with that last statement.

It was as if they were communicating about his plan on a subsonic level. He didn't know… couldn't, James told himself. He simply smiled at up at his adult son and hated, absolutely hated lying to him. It tore at his gut like a knife. It needed to be done however; he needed to be safe, protected. If anything ever happened to Castiel, James could never forgive himself. He still never had from what happened with Catherine. Nevertheless, it was his plan and he promised himself he'd stick to it. Project Purity would live again… one way or another.


End file.
